Eulogy

Author and read by: Carey Long, Son

back to me over and over again. Mother, Mom. Mom, Mother.

So, I switched from trying to give a eulogy about who Norma Long was, to pay tribute to what Norma Long was. She was first and foremost a loving Mother to three imperfect sons and one perfect daughter. A role in which she greatly excelled in performing.

She married our dad on Valentine’s Day, Feb 14, 1954. They immediately did what most married couples do. They started to build a strong foundation. Because a marriage cannot survive without a strong foundation. A family cannot survive without a strong foundation. Mom and Dad continued to build and reinforce that foundation until on August 18, 1957, at approximately 10pm, Norma Long became a Mother. She was then immediately accepted into that exclusive club. A club where no men are allowed. The Motherhood Club. The Clan of Mother’s.

Once that first child is born, wives switch gears and become Mothers. Husbands have to adjust to the fact their importance just slipped into second place.

It is the mothers that give their children their first meal. As babies, it is the mothers that protect them when they are most vulnerable. Mothers even gave themselves the perfect nickname, “Mama Bear”.

Norma was our Mama Bear. She gave us our first meal. She protected us. Because that is what Mothers do.

And a mother’s protection never stops. From the time you are born, until the time our mothers pass away, they will always come to your rescue.

Our brother Kirk worked for a business that sold hot tubs. One day, the owner decided to pack up his business and move to Canada. He asked Kirk if he would drive a U Haul loaded with hot tubs, promising to pay all his expenses. Things went well, until Kirk reached the Canadian border. He was denied entry because he did not have a Canadian work permit. Kirk called the owner and explained the situation. The next day, the owner showed up, paid the motel bill and gave Kirk enough money to buy a one-way bus ticket from Seattle, WA to Denver, CO. Kirk called Mom and said, “I need help”. That’s all mom needed to hear. She packed up her car, filled the tank with gas, and drove 16 hours by herself to Denver, CO.

When Kirk got off that bus, there was Mom waiting outside to bring him home. Why? Because that is what Mothers do. Because no matter how old you are. A Mother will always protect her children.

As her children get older, the role of being a mom takes on more responsibilities. One of those roles is to teach their children how to succeed in life. How to live as adults. I like to call this part, “Mother’s Life’s Lessons”. How many of you as adults and having some interaction with one of your own children suddenly had this thought pop into your mind. “I remember the time when Mom…..”. Because some time back in your own childhood, your mom taught you a Life Lesson. You didn’t know it at the time, but your brain filed it away. Tucked it into a memory cell only to be recalled later in your life.

I remember the last time my mom spanked me. I can’t remember what dreadful sin I had committed, but she came into my bedroom and announced that whatever I had done deserved a spanking. And when she was done, I turned around, looked at her, and laughed.

I was taught two important Life Lesson’s that day. #1, when your mom spanks you, don’t turn around and laugh. It does not end well. They sometimes pull out that ace card all children dread to hear, “Just wait until your father gets home.”

Life Lesson #2. We both had reached a moment in our lives when one form of parenting was no longer going to be effective. I didn’t know at the time, but that Life Lesson #2 was stored somewhere in my brain, to be recalled again when I started raising my son Michael.

At one time or another, we all reach that point in our lives, when some Life Lesson will be recalled and put into action. And we have our own Norma Long’s to thank for that.

Norma taught us many other Life Lesson’s. Instead of sewing our buttons on shirts, she taught us how to sew. How to fix our own snacks, prepare meals. How to do laundry. We learned how to properly sort clothes. Most importantly, which pile gets bleach, which pile doesn’t. The Life Lessons go on and on. They never end. Our brain goes “Yep. This is ones important. Let’s just file it away, for future use”.

If you want to know the life lesson, I use the most, it is if your food doesn’t taste good, all it needs it more ketchup.

Once they become a member of the Motherhood Club, one of their main goals is to unlock the next achievement level, a promotion to the Grandmothers Club. Mothers still keep an active membership in the original club, it’s just that they retire those parenting rules and replace it with what I call Grandma’s Rules. It’s Payback time for all the awful things we did as children to our parents. Many of us here now are grandparents. You may look at your grandkids and think if you were my child, you wouldn’t get away with that. Instead you may reward them with another candy bar.

On June 12, 1990, Shawna Paige Long was born, and Mom gratefully received her membership card to the Grandmother’s Club. The first thing she did was hang a sign in the kitchen that read “Parents say no, just call 1-800-GRANDMA”.

Grandmas do stuff they would never dream of doing to their children. For example, they may look at the clock. When it is about an hour before the parent’s show up, Grandma may ask them “Hey, who wants another ice cream float, before you go home”.

Mom had a glass eye for as long as I can remember. For those of you who don’t have a glass eye, it’s a lot like wearing your first set of contacts. You have to get used to it. When she wasn’t using it, she would wear this cool pirate’s patch and her glass eye was kept in this little jewelry box. Her glass eye was one of her most prized possessions. And she used it to her advantage all the time.

When Kim and I lived in Frisco, TX, Dee and Mom came to visit us. We were preparing to out somewhere and Mom said “Wait, I have to put my eye in”. She disappears into the bathroom and comes out a few moments later and walks up to Kim, uses her fingers to open up her right eye and asks, “Did I get it put in the right way?”. For those have never seen a glass eye up close, in tiny little letters, are the words, “This side up”. And Mom had purposely put her eye in upside down.

Another time, when Shawna was in grade school Grandma would pick her up and they would go back to Grandma’s house. Once there, Shawna would go to the pantry to grab an after-school snack. But one day, Shawna opened the pantry door and discovered there were no goldfish. Bewildered, she asked Grandma, “Where are my Goldfish?” Mom went to the pantry, looked around and couldn’t find them either.

So, imagine being a first grader, seeing your grandma pulling her eyeball out of small box and start scanning the pantry shelves above your head, until that glass eye sees your box of Goldfish sitting on the top shelf. I can see Mom now, looking at her watch and telling Shawna, “Don’t worry your parents will be here in about an hour”.

Like I said, the rules Mothers use to raise their kids and the rules they use to raise their grandkids are two distinctly separate sets of rules. When Shawna grew older it was time for her to learn how to drive. Grandma was always a willing side kick. One day driving back to Mom’s house, Shawna turned the corner at 19th and Boston a little too hard and a whole lot too fast and when she sideswiped the curb, Shawna managed to ruin not one, but two tires on Mom’s car. Now it had been of her own kids, limping from 19th Street to 31st street on two flat tires have resulted in a good old fashioned ass chewing. But because Shawna did it, Mom just simply said, “I needed new tires anyway”. That’s why grandparents will always have a special place in their grandkid’s hearts.

Mom was a Florist for many years. She was passionate in creating her floral designs. When Dad passed away, Mom said she was going to do a special funeral arrangement for him. At my dad’s funeral was the biggest floral arrangement Mom could make. But what was missing were the words Loving Father, Devoted Husband, or Rest in Peace. Instead, there was a banner, that said, “See you later, alligator”.

Lastly, Mom was a big Texas Tech fan. To me, the saddest part of her passing, was she died less than 24 hours before her beloved Red Raiders won their first conference championship. And hopefully their first National Championship. So, Mom, we’re here to send you on your way with a big “Guns Up!” “See you later, alligator”.

Norma Veldeen Sammann Long was born on Jan 23, 1937, married our dad, William Edward Long. She was preceded in death by Dad and our brother, Kirk.

I tried to compose a eulogy based on who Norma was, and with 68 years of loving memories, I really couldn’t translate those memories into words. Like most mothers, she was a great cook. Say the words “Norma Long” to Thad Bartley, and his response will always be, “Fried Chicken”.

But two descriptions of her kept coming